Details of Ricky Rick’s suicide notes have been revealed.

The first note which was addressed to his wife Bianca Naidoo read:

Dear Bianca 

This pain is too much. I don’t want you to blame yourself for my life being unbearable. You gave me more love than I deserved. Live your life. Do not hide the light you have me every day. 


I am sorry for being the one who gives up but the pain I feel is too much to deal with. The voices in my head have never gone away. I wish I was stronger, but I am not. Please forgive me. I love you. 

In the second suicide note, Ricky first addressed his son Maik:

Follow you passion my son. The world is better than you can ever imagine. I love you. 

To his other son, Jordan, Ricky wrote:

Jordan, the best thing that ever happened in my life. You taught me so much about life. Thank you for being so good to me. Thank you for being such an inspiration to me. I love you.

However, South Africa Police spokesman, Mavela Masondo declined to confirm the existence of the two suicide notes.